Trust as a Belief
Trust is often broken when trauma occurs, and many people with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and secondary trauma struggle with trust issues. Trust is actually a belief in a person or thing; whether or not you trust in the person or thing depends on if you believe he/she/it is truthful, reliable and has the ability and strengths that they are perceived to have. Trauma can often lead to a lack of trust in yourself, others, and/or the environment and needs to be repaired for emotional healing to take place.
Impact of Fear on Trust
Lack of trust is often based on various fears, which can include but is not limited to:
- Fear of abuse or injury
- Fear of rejection
- Fear of being exposed
- Fear of intimacy
- Fear of not having control
- Fear of the unexpected
There are so many situations and hurtful and damaging actions that can lead to these situations, but the bottom line is once your trust is broken there is a lot of repairing that needs to be done.
Repairing the Damage
The first step is to stop treating life as if it’s the past. Reliving my past never helped me, and reliving your past will never help you. I had to learn to let go of my past, and if you truly want emotional healing you will need to be willing to let go of yours. Holding on to the past actually means holding on to hurts and resentments, which leads to being filled with distrust of others, things, and even yourself and your own actions and choices.
My Personal Story
I was in total spiritual and emotional darkness at one point in my life and I had no idea how to get out of it on my own. I had one terrible relationship after another, was addicted to drugs and alcohol and had years of trauma and secondary trauma that I had never dealt with. I was a caseworker at the time, and it is probably not surprising that I didn’t trust anyone to help me. I ended up praying out of desperation, and begged God to help me.
After that prayer I decided to talk about my need for help with my boss and a co-worker who I knew was in recovery. To my surprise, I was not judged or shamed and opening up to others was exactly what I needed to do in order to begin trusting again. I know that the strength to do this came through prayer and reaching out to God. I started getting counseling, entered a recovery program, began attending a church, got connected to a recovery program, and allowed others to pray for me. Most importantly, I developed a relationship with Jesus as my savior and my relationship with him changed my outlook on people, life, and how to trust and live. My trust in others gradually increased as God’s mercy, grace and love filled my life. I relied on prayer and reading the bible as my lifeline for growing, changing, and opening up to people, situations, and relationships. I realized that God wants us to live a full life, free of bondage or baggage that keeps us from being in relationship with God.
Restoring Trust
I did not trust, know or understand God for years, and saw him as distant and not involved in everyday life but I was proven wrong when God answered one prayer after another to show me He was near and leading my healing. Trusting God and others can still be difficult at times, especially when new hurts are experienced. Despite the hurts, I choose to move forward in life and not look backwards and continue to trust and you can too! If I can help you with this at all or you would like to tell me your story, contact me at lia@freedlifecounseling.com
#PTSD #trauma #secondarytrauma #panic #relivingmypast #letgoofmypast #emotionalhealing